I am the queen of horrible, dead-end jobs. It is a talent, I swear. You know the truffle pigs in France that root out expensive mushrooms, I have the same ability. Except I can root out a great job, get hired and then suffer through a catastrophic management change.
It never works out for me.
Looking back, I cannot say I actually enjoyed working at any of my former companies. I know it’s work and not play time but still…
Shouldn’t you take pride in your job?
Yep, never happened for me. Maybe I have a low tolerance for corporate speak and office politics. Every place I came in contact with had something off about it. I felt the slow draining of any personality into the mode of the corporate mind meld.
Like I said I have a talent for finding crap.
Desperate Times Lead to Desperate Measures
I didn’t start out this way. I followed the righteous path of working hard in school and receiving great grades. In no short words, I was kinda that overachieving kid you hated in class.
I had a plan. Law school was always in my future plan. Then I took the LSAT. Like George Costanza’s SAT scores, my placement rate is going to the grave with me. Yes, I completely froze and freaked out. Serious doubts about my future clouded my mind. I started to realize that I didn’t want to go into law. I spent a good year working an internship for the local public defender’s office and all I can say is… wow.
Nothing like dealing with child rapists, murderers, and drug dealers to change your perspective in life. Maybe defending the trash wasn’t in my plan but putting them away would be.
I decided to apply to several local police departments. If you ever had an inkling of what it takes to get hired, calling it a process is being kind. Written tests, physical agility, psychological exams and background checks are all included. But it was more than that, it is a waiting game. Every department has a ranking list and you sit on there for up to two years.
And there I waited, waited and waited.
What, No Job?!
I was definitely naive in believing that my grades and experience could land a great job. I went from interview to interview.
Not enough experience!
You’re too intelligent for this job!
One recruiter told me that my college experience was limiting my job opportunities. Companies do not want to hire someone that might quit and find a better opportunity a few months from now. I was getting doors slammed in my face before I could even get on the front porch.
I started to get desperate. The economy had tanked and it was difficult to even find a minimum wage job. With student loan bills piling up, I needed to find work. That meant taking anything that came my way.
I felt like I sold my soul. And in a way, I did.
I went through a series of crap jobs ranging from retail to security to customer service. Some of the events I saw, made me close my eyes and shake my head. Fistfights, illegal bookkeeping, HIPPA law violations and more. And that’s just the beginning!
If you think the corporate world is all sunshine and rainbows, I have another perspective for you. There is a dark underbelly and I’ll bring you my little slice of corporate hell.
From Micromanaged to Middle Finger are my former adventures taking place in the real life hellholes of the corporate world. You’ll relive my experiences with psycho bosses, incompetent coworkers, and mundane job responsibilities. Everything that brought me to the edge.
I wish I was making it up but the corporate office truth is definitely stranger than fiction.